this is what the economy has done to us

I know it is petty..................very petty.

And there are people going homeless.  People have lost their jobs and don't know how they are going to feed their children.

I have been there....really.

I know this is going to sound so very petty!

But, this is my built in microwave oven.

Do you see how it is open???

Yep...that is scotch tape.

A couple of months ago.....I heard a bizarre noise in my kitchen.  It took me a while to figure out where it was coming from.

It was the turntable in the microwave oven.  As long as the door is closed....it turns...for no reason.  It just turns.

I have very good hearing...so, once I found the noise...I could not let it just continue.  So, I left the door open.  Then Mr. Man comes a long with the total fix for my problem!

Tape!

I would have thought....a new microwave.  Nope....tape.

I was disgusted.  Because at the same time that he installed tape on the microwave....I had an extension cord running from the garage into the house lying on the floor for the garbage disposal.  Why you ask????

Well, we had a power surge and the electricity breaker was flipped to the outlet that services the garbage disposal and neither one of could remember just how to get it back on.  Now, we are not stupid people but....our house was once owned by a contractor.  A special contractor.  So, things are strange.

And while I had both of these going on....I also have a bucket under the sink to catch the drips from the leaking garbage disposal.

Horrifying!

When I had the summer meeting of the PTO at my house...I told my husband if just one of those women saw the status of my kitchen...I would hang him by the balls.

Did I just say this has been going on since summer????

Yes, I did!

I have tolerated this for months.

I have laughed at it because well......it is laughable!

Both Hubby & daughter think that when the sticky wears off of one piece of tape...instead of replacing the tape....they add an extension.  For almost a week...the extension was also holding a piece of my daughter's long brown hair.  Never bothered anyone else....but sure did me!

So, economy please pick up.

Hubby will not by a new microwave while this one still works.

Oh, and did I tell you that when you use the number 3....the lights flash???

Oh, and today was Black Friday.  And did you know that the microwave was marked 1/2 price????

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• Kenmore Over the Range Microwaves
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OK....this was a bitch...I know.  Do I want it for Christmas???  Hell NO!  But, I do want it.

Husbands.................grrr!

Happy Thanksgiving List

This has been an interesting holiday that is upon me.  And the only way I can approach all that I have to say is via a list.

I am thankful for the life I have.

I am thankful for the parents that brought me into this world.

I am thankful that they did the best they could with what they had both were injured and unable to parent me in the way I wanted to be parented.  I forgive my parents for holding them to to a level that they ended up failing.

I love my Mom and miss her.

I think I love my Dad altho I really didn't know him and what I did know I didn't like.  But, he was my Father and without him...I would not be here today.

My Father has been dead for almost years.

I am grateful for the peace and sanity that my life holds when I don't have a relationship with my family.

I wish it weren't this way but this is the way it is.

I have seen my Mom around town several times over the past 2 weeks.  Normally, I can feel her vibration......but with forgiveness in my heart....I can't anymore.

So, I walked in front of her in the WalMart parking lot...she was in her car and I was pushing Nash in a cart.  I was sicker than a dog and prayed that she would be civil.

Then I saw her in Joann's the next day.  I was cruising around checking out the new store when I heard a gasp.  I looked up to see her running away towards my Aunt.  The stare of hate penetrated my soul from my Aunt.  I parked my cart and left.

I have had many nightmares again after seeing my Mom.

But, this is the way it is.

She is the center of her whole world and when I don't have a relationship with her.....I don't have to be in a world where my children can't be the center of my world.

I do miss her tho....but no, I don't want her back in my life.

My daughter is having a really hard time without a family and I feel awful about this.  I have told her if she wants a relationship with any of them....I would facilitate it.  I think she is afraid of going back to the Hell we were in when were were removing ourselves from them.

And both Sophie and I miss Ginny.....very much!

This will be our first Thanksgiving without talking to Ginny, Sophie's paternal grandmother.

I know Sophie is very sad but won't express it.  She is pretending that Ginny is not gone because it is easier than facing the fact that Ginny is gone.

Sophie is also mad at me for the loss of these relationships.  I am a Mom...this is my job.  :)

But....there is a huge hole in my heart where Ginny should be.  I have missed her terribly since she died.

She knew of the craziness of my family and loved me anyway.

She held the spot of her son in my heart as well.  I miss him everyday.

But, today I want to be thankful.....

Thankful for my children

 Thankful for my wonderful Husband....whoever he is  :)

I am thankful for my many friends

I am thankful for Deb for stepping up and filling a void in my life.  You have a very special place in my heart and in my children's lives.  Thank you for being a part of my life.

I am thankful for my extended family....step-children, grandchildren, in-laws.....they make my world.


I am thankful for being a big fish in a small pond of sorts.  I like walking around our town and being able to say hello to people I know and that know me as well.


I am thankful for those that I love and trust and for those I love and distrust too.  Because when you mix it up.....you need them all to make a balance in the world.


Happy Thanksgiving to all.

parenting - keeping my kids in decent shoes

Today....I am joining up with Mama Kat and taking on one of her writing prompts -

Your biggest parenting challenge and/or joy






My parenting challenge is shoes.

Now, I must say...this is not my first child that I have had shoes issues with.

Poor Sophie...when she was a baby...I had no idea how fast feet grew and she literally outgrew her one pair of shoes before she could walk.  Granted I was a little busy with postpartum depression and the death of the hubby....but, her toes were sticking out and I was oblivious and totally unaware of what to do.

So, here is my story for this weeks shoe....horror....or challenge  :)

Nash is able to put on his own shoes.  He is 6.  He has had this things for the last 6 to 9 months that his shoes MUST stay on the front or back porch until he needs them.  I have many times instructed him to PLEASE put his shoes in the closet.  As this is where most people keep their shoes.

This always seems to fall on either deaf or unwanted info ears.

Nash is a loosy goosy kind of boy.  He does NOT like tight clothing of any kind or shoes for that matter.  And once we enter the chillier months of the year...he is in heaven because he can just live in sweats.

So, back to my story.

the other day...I had picked him up at school and told him that Daddy was working a double and we needed to take him some dinner.  Nash loves to go to where Daddy works because they have a huge amount of rocks as landscaping that he can crawl all over while we are there.

This is when I noticed a problem.

While climbing....I see that his black tennis shoes have some kind of white mark on the toe.

I have seen this type of mark before.

I think back over the past several weeks.  It all makes sense.  Why when he takes his shoes off outside he walks away with damp footprints following him. 

THE BOY HAS HOLES IN HIS SHOES.  OMG!

I am President of the PTO.  I just donated a turkey to the school for a needy family and my son....has holes in his shoes!  I was oblivious to his OUTGROWING HIS SHOES!

HORROR!

OK...I tell Nash that I need him to get in the mini van and stand inside so I can check his feet.

I hear....MOooooOM!

I have him stand and look at his feet.  The top of the toes on one shoe is gone!  I look further to see that the bottom of his shoe is only secured to the shoe in the back half.

OMG!

So I ask....how long as this been like this?  Is this why your feet have been wet?  Why didn't you say something to me?

And I hear..............with a smile.................I don't know.

OMG!

So, you know where I went...immediately!


The shoe store!

tag....you're it

Today was not a good day for parenting in our house.

I have had a slight case of cooties...but the cooties have a weird body ache thing going with it that along with me trying to utilize orthotic insoles for my sore feet are now working...but throwing the rest of the body out of whack.

So, as said by my lovely daughter Sophie....I am bitchy.

And the Hubb-ster decided to play with fencing...long story that I come out bad in the end...so I will skip it.  Anyway.....Hubb-ster hurt his back and while he has been quite the martyr about the pain....today I had had enough and told him to REALLY rest and take care of himself.

OK....so, two parents down.

Nash....loves to play his video game in the living room.  It's hecka annoying.  So, Hubb-ster....who knows nothing about electronics says hey....I bet I can hook it up to YOUR TV in YOUR room.  I didn't even pay attention to this because I knew it would never, ever happen!

And guess what....he did it!

OK...hats off to ya buddy!  I am impressed!

So, then later Hubb-ster is in the shower...and Nash wants to watch real TV.  Now shit is hitting the fan.

I try everything in my power to get that TV to work!

Hubb-ster finally starts in trying everything he has to get the TV to watch regular TV and I realize....it was a fluke!  YES folks...a fluke of nature that he was able to get the video game to work. 

The last time there was a problem with Nash's TV...it took me 3 DAYS!  Yes, 3 days to get it to work.  Nash is being....Nash.  Impatient.

And low and behold.....after a miracle...and cursing...I get it to work and Nash already irritated decides that fucking with our heads would be a good think to do.  A bitchy Mommy and a very crabby Daddy....not people to mess with.

I say no and walk away. 

Hubb-ster wants to be a good Dad...he plays the "I am going to see how far I can go until you explode" game.  Hubb-ster eventually comes out with Nash crying and whining. 

I am done....I announce that I think Sophie is right.  I am a bitch...I should go lock myself in the room and hide.  Hubb-ster...its now on you.  You started it...now finish it.

I lay on the bed and listen to the horror that is going on outside of my door.  And realize that I left an unarmed man alone with my son and that son is a genius at "I am going to see how far I can go until you explode" game.  And his only recourse is to become.........LT. McVey!

He is a bastard!  I love my Hubb-ster but......when he is at the end of his ropes his only recourse is to fall back on his work training...and become...the dreaded LT. McVey.

I run out to save my boy and put the Hubb-ster in a time out.

It takes me 25 minutes to calm the situation.

I punish the boy....and send him to bed.

Then I go apologize to my Hubb-ster, or putting him in that position with out the benefit of back up or knowledge of the forces he was to encounter.

Homes need a safe place for parents!

oh the Christmas list

• I used to be on the list
• when I was so very poor
• I had my shopping done and over with by Halloween
• now....here it is the middle of November and I am still struggling with my list
• this is going to be a slim year
• the state of California has not been our friend this year
• cutting hubby's pay
• and upgrading their radiology equipment so that my contract got canceled
• big pay cut for the McVey's this year
• I usually go nuts for Christmas
• I totally overspend and spoil my kids rotten
• not feeling it this year
• and I think they aren't either
• their lists are small this year and I am not going to push it
• I am kind of looking forward to a meek & mini holiday this year
• only me, hubby and the 2 kids this year at home
• everyone else will be out of town or with other family
• I tried to convince ours kids that we could go somewhere to just get away
• Sophie was adamant that we not leave our house
• I hate it when my words come back to bite my butt  :)
• so mini Christmas....could be a blessing in disguise  :)

#1 Boss

Tonight I had a funny conversation with my son.

As we were tucking him into bed...or trying...he comes running from the kitchen into his bedroom.  I ask where he was?   He says he got a drink of water....I asked who said he could?  He says Dad.  I said is Dad the Boss?  He looks at me and says...he is #2 Boss.

I laugh.

I ask Nash...who is #1 Boss.  He looks at me and says...you are #1 Boss.  I smile and say yes, I am!

So, I ask him...what does #1 Boss do.  He says...everything.

So, I ask...what does #2 Boss do?

He says....he tells neighbor Nicholas what to do???

I laugh.

So, we are kissing every other and telling each other how much we love each other. And I ask him...if he thinks he will be a Daddy one day.

He says yes.

So, I ask him...will you be a #1 Boss or a #2 Boss.

He looks at me with a very concerned look on his face...I only want to be a #2 Boss.  I aks why?

He says....#1 Boss does EVERYTHING!

LOL....yes, I do!

if a wedding is in your future

Did you know I am revamping my business into a wedding planning business??

I am working with a business coach and am so very excited by what is coming my way and having someone in my corner really pointing me in the right direction.

Wedding planning can be a very hectic job.  And everyone needs help.

If you are looking for classy or monogrammed  wedding invitations there are so many places that offer to do this for you....but who would you think of using???  I have seen people design their own and sometimes that just doesn't work out.  Yes, its very homey looking but if you are not a designer......thi sis ht efirst thing people are going to see that represents your wedding and everything about how it will go.

Make sure you shop around and see their work before you buy.   This is one place...where you really need to not cut corners get someone who know what they are doing!

Do your research and get the best you can afford.