Thursday, July 12, 2012

fear..is life changing but so is love!

As you know from past blogs....I love the www.purposefairy.com

I opened my email today and saw this quote from John Lennon.

“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life. ~ John Lennon


Wow.  I was never a fan of the Beatles...not that I didn't like them...I just was neutral.

Then I married David....he was a FAN!

He always said that John Lennon was his spiritual father.  When David died I played his greatest hits at the funeral.  I think it's how most people knew they were at the right place.

Anyway....back to the quote.

When I went thru the death of my son on December 25, 1995 and then the sudden death of my husband on April 29, 1998.  I was overwhelmed with fear.  I hid from life.  I walled myself off from everything except my daughter and anything that had to do with her.  I would have committed suicide because I really thought about it.  But, I was afraid if I did commit suicide I might never see my husband or son again on the other side.

So, I was plagued by fear.  I lived like that for many, many years.  And even went I struck out and found my new hubby....I never fully committed to him because I was afraid to bury someone I loved...again.  Sure, we had a baby.  And I accepted his engagement ring...but I would not marry him!

Then I one day....it was time.  I knew that I loved him enough...enough to bury him and survive it all again.

That was love!

And when I let love in....my world opened!  I became a better person.  I became a person that others wanted to know.  I became a person....I wanted to know.

Letting love in...was amazing.  I sat in that restaurant on June 20, 2008 knowing I loved and wanted to be loved...forever.  That I deserved love.  And when I opened that door.....wow!

Fear is death of your soul.  Love is giving it freedom!

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